Imagine going to the doctor with no real ailments. But wanting to feel better, you ask for a prescription of cocaine.
Cocaine may solve a short term need but it has long term negative effects. Cocaine is not the answer. Proper diet and exercise is.
Discounting works the same way. It's never the real answer.
Yet, discounting is so appealing. It works so wonderfully well.
Put something on sale and customers buy it.
Sales spike.
Business is thriving...or so it seems.
Discounting is exactly like cocaine. It is less effective each and every time you snort it. The initial high is never as good as that first time. Eventually, customers don't even buy unless there's a discount.
Business erodes.
Profits sink.
Sickness prevails.
The retail industry has become heavily addicted to discounting.
In the battlefield of retail, businesses look for reasonable excuses to put another sale on the window. The traditional reasons to buy for Valentines Day, Easter, Summer break, Back to School, and Christmas are too far apart. Retail needs other reasons to keep customers coming within the two months of each occasion.
Those reasons feed the addiction. The addiction to looking for a sale.
Retail started advertising "Black Friday" deals about four years ago in Canada.
It doesn't make sense to me. Black Friday doesn't mean anything to Canadians. Traditionally, Black Friday is the unofficial start to the Christmas shopping season in the United States. It follows American Thanksgiving, as the last Friday of November.
Canadian Thanksgiving is in October. Black Friday is just another Friday. The unofficial start of Christmas shopping in Canada has long been immediately following Remembrance Day.
In an industry where it seems like everyone is addicted to the same drug, it has become the norm for consumers to look for the deal.
And look we will.
Until someone gives us a better deal.
When consumers look for deals, there is no loyalty to brands, products or businesses. The sale becomes transactional.
No wonder retail stores close so frequently.
Their competitive advantage is based on price.
And price is always the easiest and fastest thing to copy.
In the words of Roy Williams, "Most retailers are twitchy little weasels".
My advice to retailers:
Don't be a twitchy little weasel.
Don't be lured in by the powder.
It won't make you feel better long term.
It will kill you.
Come up with a better competitive advantage.
And watch you're coke laced neighbours die off over time.
Tuesday, November 22, 2016
Tuesday, September 20, 2016
Birch tree in the night
Oh great tree in the night, you look like a man.
You sit there empty all day, until nightfall you stand.
I ignore you.
But you are alive.
And you salute to me as if you respect me.
Respect goes both ways and I have none for you.
I don't notice you.
You are a tree.
You must be lonely
Until the gentle cricket creaks your name.
In the glowing eyes of dusk,
You wake up.
The forest jumps with discussions of the daily events.
Oh great giant, you are free,
Chained to your roots.
But that's what you are, fore you are a tree.
You will never move from that place,
But that's what you do.
Stand and wait.
Until death.
Because you are a tree.
A great soldier of the forest.
Standing on guard to protect all other living things
Against me and the rest.
You sit there empty all day, until nightfall you stand.
I ignore you.
But you are alive.
And you salute to me as if you respect me.
Respect goes both ways and I have none for you.
I don't notice you.
You are a tree.
You must be lonely
Until the gentle cricket creaks your name.
In the glowing eyes of dusk,
You wake up.
The forest jumps with discussions of the daily events.
Oh great giant, you are free,
Chained to your roots.
But that's what you are, fore you are a tree.
You will never move from that place,
But that's what you do.
Stand and wait.
Until death.
Because you are a tree.
A great soldier of the forest.
Standing on guard to protect all other living things
Against me and the rest.
Tuesday, September 6, 2016
Trust your feelings
There's a feeling deep inside of me that won't go away.
It hurts. It excites. It cries to come up.
I can't explain it.
I don't know why it's there.
The feeling or urge is a desire to do something great.
I thought it was because I didn't have any biological children. Maybe it was my opportunity to leave a mark on the world.
It's like Obi Wan Kenobi is saying to me, "Rick, trust your feelings".
I've always had this feeling. When I was six years old, I expressed them to my grandma.
At 16, I said similar things to my uncle Danny.
When I was 23, I was in a dead end job, going nowhere. I thought my feelings had lied to me. In my mini depression, I told my future wife I was never going to do anything great. She corrected me and reinforced that I was destined for amazing things.
I fell in love with her that day.
Since then the feelings won't go away. They scream at me sometimes. They pet me even when I sleep.
Is it confidence dancing around and making fun of me?
Is it ego singing "Eye of the Tiger" at top of its lungs?
Is it spirits sharing their secrets with me?
Is it my soul telling me the reason for my birth?
Is it wishful thinking?
Or am I just plain crazy?
I don't think I'm alone.
I read the founder of Nike's (Phil Knight) autobiography, "Shoe Dog". He had similar feelings. He explained them so well, that I started reading it again.
These feelings are inexplainable.
I feel the most alive when I work with them.
I am dead when I don't.
It's not about money or fame.
It's something else.
Maybe it's "The Force".
Whether it is strong in me or not, it freaks me out sometimes.
It hurts. It excites. It cries to come up.
I can't explain it.
I don't know why it's there.
The feeling or urge is a desire to do something great.
I thought it was because I didn't have any biological children. Maybe it was my opportunity to leave a mark on the world.
It's like Obi Wan Kenobi is saying to me, "Rick, trust your feelings".
I've always had this feeling. When I was six years old, I expressed them to my grandma.
At 16, I said similar things to my uncle Danny.
When I was 23, I was in a dead end job, going nowhere. I thought my feelings had lied to me. In my mini depression, I told my future wife I was never going to do anything great. She corrected me and reinforced that I was destined for amazing things.
I fell in love with her that day.
Since then the feelings won't go away. They scream at me sometimes. They pet me even when I sleep.
Is it confidence dancing around and making fun of me?
Is it ego singing "Eye of the Tiger" at top of its lungs?
Is it spirits sharing their secrets with me?
Is it my soul telling me the reason for my birth?
Is it wishful thinking?
Or am I just plain crazy?
I don't think I'm alone.
I read the founder of Nike's (Phil Knight) autobiography, "Shoe Dog". He had similar feelings. He explained them so well, that I started reading it again.
These feelings are inexplainable.
I feel the most alive when I work with them.
I am dead when I don't.
It's not about money or fame.
It's something else.
Maybe it's "The Force".
Whether it is strong in me or not, it freaks me out sometimes.
Sunday, September 4, 2016
No trespassing
When I see a sign that reads, "No Trespassing", I am hesitant to continue. The sign is clear. In my head, it implies that I will be shot on sight if I pass that imaginary tree line acting like a fortress wall.
Respectful of the sign's demands, I turn and walk the other way.
Something cool happened to me recently. I was in another country. My internal clock said 6 am even though it was only 4 am locally. Not able to sleep, I went for a walk.
There was a gravel trail that led from my room towards a mountaintop. I wanted to see sunrise from the mountaintop. I had seen others enter this trail, so I knew it was fairly safe. I strolled along for about five minutes when the path split. One path was still gravelled but much narrower. The other was only dirt. The safe choice was the gravelled path.
Searching for adventure, I took the road less travelled. The air was clean. I could smell the sunshine peaking through the horizon.
Ten minutes on my new path, I saw the back of a diamond shaped sign. Wondering what the sign said, I anxiously skipped to reveal my horror.
It read, "No Trespassing".
Was I a trespasser?
Did I miss another sign and mistakingly end up on someone else's property?
Was someone going to shoot me?
Once I passed the sign, should I be allowed to return from where I came?
The fear I had was inexplicable. I had broken one of my rules. Respect the wishes of others.
I was now a trespasser. As I retraced my steps to my room, I rehearsed several answers in case I met up with the Marlboro man and his shotgun.
"I don't want no trouble sir, I got lost"
"I must've missed the "No Trespassing sign", I'll be on my way"
"I didn't see anything. I'm just a bit lost"
I rushed back to my room. With my heart full of adrenaline, I wondered why that rogue sign existed. I asked the owner of the property about the sign. He told me not to worry about it.
The sign said, "No trespassing". Was this sign to protect us from outsiders coming into our encampment?
Nope. Strangers walk those trails every day. We want people to enjoy the beauty of our complex.
Why is there a "No trespassing" sign?
I don't know. It must have been put there from the previous owners. Did you get to see the sunrise?
No, I was too afraid of being shot, so I scurried back to my room.
What I learned from this experience is there are rules I don't want to break. Yet in order to witness the beautiful sunrise, I had to ignore the "No Trespassing" sign.
I lost out on an amazing experience because of a stupid, inconsequential rule.
What stupid, inconsequential rules are holding you back from experiencing a better life?
Respectful of the sign's demands, I turn and walk the other way.
Something cool happened to me recently. I was in another country. My internal clock said 6 am even though it was only 4 am locally. Not able to sleep, I went for a walk.
There was a gravel trail that led from my room towards a mountaintop. I wanted to see sunrise from the mountaintop. I had seen others enter this trail, so I knew it was fairly safe. I strolled along for about five minutes when the path split. One path was still gravelled but much narrower. The other was only dirt. The safe choice was the gravelled path.
Searching for adventure, I took the road less travelled. The air was clean. I could smell the sunshine peaking through the horizon.
Ten minutes on my new path, I saw the back of a diamond shaped sign. Wondering what the sign said, I anxiously skipped to reveal my horror.
It read, "No Trespassing".
Was I a trespasser?
Did I miss another sign and mistakingly end up on someone else's property?
Was someone going to shoot me?
Once I passed the sign, should I be allowed to return from where I came?
The fear I had was inexplicable. I had broken one of my rules. Respect the wishes of others.
I was now a trespasser. As I retraced my steps to my room, I rehearsed several answers in case I met up with the Marlboro man and his shotgun.
"I don't want no trouble sir, I got lost"
"I must've missed the "No Trespassing sign", I'll be on my way"
"I didn't see anything. I'm just a bit lost"
I rushed back to my room. With my heart full of adrenaline, I wondered why that rogue sign existed. I asked the owner of the property about the sign. He told me not to worry about it.
The sign said, "No trespassing". Was this sign to protect us from outsiders coming into our encampment?
Nope. Strangers walk those trails every day. We want people to enjoy the beauty of our complex.
Why is there a "No trespassing" sign?
I don't know. It must have been put there from the previous owners. Did you get to see the sunrise?
No, I was too afraid of being shot, so I scurried back to my room.
What I learned from this experience is there are rules I don't want to break. Yet in order to witness the beautiful sunrise, I had to ignore the "No Trespassing" sign.
I lost out on an amazing experience because of a stupid, inconsequential rule.
What stupid, inconsequential rules are holding you back from experiencing a better life?
Wednesday, August 31, 2016
Regurgitated learning
There are countless examples of phrases that are engrained into our rule-making world.
We sheepingly follow them like commandments even though they weren't on the tablets Moses brought down from Mount Sinai.
When it comes to rules. There is one constant. There are no rules. Or as Lexus pointed out in a recent commercial, "rules weren't made for the exceptional, they were written by them".
I sit in a lot of business meetings where highly intelligent people regurgitate the same rules they read in a book or learned in a classroom.
There's no need to reinvent the wheel.
If you conceive it and believe it, you can achieve it.
Word of mouth is the most powerful form of marketing.
It's not about the product you sell. It's about the experience you offer.
On their own, all of those sentences make sense. But so what. What is the real learning behind each of them.
Can I learn from them?
Can I expand on them?
Can I break them?
Rules are accepted until someone breaks them and makes our lives better. We then all realize the rule wasn't true.
Cars couldn't be built in 73 minutes, until Ford figured it out.
Men couldn't fly until the Wright Brothers showed us otherwise.
Cars can't fly until someone figures out that George Jetson wasn't just a cartoon.
Automated learning can be done by robots and computers. We've been taught to read something, learn about it and then regurgitate it as knowledge. We don't need knowledge. That's why we have Google.
We have to be greater than Google.
We have to ask the hard questions. We have to get deeper in our understanding. We have to come up with new innovations. Google doesn't come up with innovations. The people behind Google do.
Here's my point.
The next time you are faced with an automatic response, ask yourself one question, "Do I know this statement to be true OR am I regurgitating something I was told.
We sheepingly follow them like commandments even though they weren't on the tablets Moses brought down from Mount Sinai.
When it comes to rules. There is one constant. There are no rules. Or as Lexus pointed out in a recent commercial, "rules weren't made for the exceptional, they were written by them".
I sit in a lot of business meetings where highly intelligent people regurgitate the same rules they read in a book or learned in a classroom.
There's no need to reinvent the wheel.
If you conceive it and believe it, you can achieve it.
Word of mouth is the most powerful form of marketing.
It's not about the product you sell. It's about the experience you offer.
On their own, all of those sentences make sense. But so what. What is the real learning behind each of them.
Can I learn from them?
Can I expand on them?
Can I break them?
Rules are accepted until someone breaks them and makes our lives better. We then all realize the rule wasn't true.
Cars couldn't be built in 73 minutes, until Ford figured it out.
Men couldn't fly until the Wright Brothers showed us otherwise.
Cars can't fly until someone figures out that George Jetson wasn't just a cartoon.
Automated learning can be done by robots and computers. We've been taught to read something, learn about it and then regurgitate it as knowledge. We don't need knowledge. That's why we have Google.
We have to be greater than Google.
We have to ask the hard questions. We have to get deeper in our understanding. We have to come up with new innovations. Google doesn't come up with innovations. The people behind Google do.
Here's my point.
The next time you are faced with an automatic response, ask yourself one question, "Do I know this statement to be true OR am I regurgitating something I was told.
Tuesday, August 30, 2016
A hate letter
I wake up every morning and look at you. Not knowing what role you play in my life, I wonder why you're still here?
I think you're lying to me.
Or do you tell me things I don't want to hear?
Words roll around my head, "Isn't that the definition of a friend?"
Without emotion, you just say it the way you see it. Actually it's so matter of fact that it pisses me off.
I've asked you to sugar coat your message.
You never do.
I've ignored you. And you were waiting for me when I was ready to come back.
I've yelled and swore at you. You always listened calmly and non judgemental.
I hate you. You've been in my life for 20 years. I think I hated you the first day I saw you.
Why did I stick around so long?
Was it hate masked as love?
Or was it necessity?
Who knows?
All I know is I've had enough. You stopped talking to me. You stopped listening.
It's been two chilly weeks. I cannot stand this coldness anymore. Today is the day I'm kicking you to the curb. You are garbage to me.
I'm getting a younger, sexier model.
Can't wait to bring her home and show the kids.
I hope the new set of bathroom scales won't be a bitch like you were.
I think you're lying to me.
Or do you tell me things I don't want to hear?
Words roll around my head, "Isn't that the definition of a friend?"
Without emotion, you just say it the way you see it. Actually it's so matter of fact that it pisses me off.
I've asked you to sugar coat your message.
You never do.
I've ignored you. And you were waiting for me when I was ready to come back.
I've yelled and swore at you. You always listened calmly and non judgemental.
I hate you. You've been in my life for 20 years. I think I hated you the first day I saw you.
Why did I stick around so long?
Was it hate masked as love?
Or was it necessity?
Who knows?
All I know is I've had enough. You stopped talking to me. You stopped listening.
It's been two chilly weeks. I cannot stand this coldness anymore. Today is the day I'm kicking you to the curb. You are garbage to me.
I'm getting a younger, sexier model.
Can't wait to bring her home and show the kids.
I hope the new set of bathroom scales won't be a bitch like you were.
Monday, August 29, 2016
No fault insurance
We are living in the age of no-fault society.
The insurance companies taught us that there are times when no one is actually at fault for an accident. But we know that's not true. It's always someone else's fault. It couldn't be us. Could it?
Everything happens to us.. It has to be someone else's fault. As we look at where to point our blame, we are forgetting to take responsibility for our own actions.
Our society is walking backwards. Evolution and technology haven't given us eyes in the back of heads yet. We have to fall down eventually. And when we do, it's gonna hurt the entire race.
Lack of responsibility is a lack of competence. We are not born with this competence. We are taught it by our parents and teachers.
Depending on our experiences, each of us have a different level of emotional competence to accept responsibility.
Hot coffee burns.
Do we have to be told to be careful?
We do if we don't have the emotional competence to accept the results of our actions.
It's easier to blame another person, an event, or a thing for the resulting damage to ourselves.
In every great story, there is are three prominent characters: The villain, the hero and the victim.
We never play the role of villain in our own stories. We accept the role of hero or victim.
The victim says "Oh my, look what the villain has done to me."
The hero says, "I will right this wrong and save the day."
The villain says with conviction, "I didn't do anything wrong."
No one is right. No one is wrong.
The villain in your story believes you are the villain. The villain actually believes you are the one who wronged him.
So who's right?
It doesn't matter. You can be right or you can be happy. That's the only choice.
We have to accept the shit that happens to us and try to understand what we could've done differently.
We're the only ones to blame.
It's time we all take responsibility like a Boss. Otherwise, our species is going to wake up one day in a dimly lit cave wondering why the gods hate us so much.
That's the path we're on.
Don't blame me.
It's not my fault.
The insurance companies taught us that there are times when no one is actually at fault for an accident. But we know that's not true. It's always someone else's fault. It couldn't be us. Could it?
Everything happens to us.. It has to be someone else's fault. As we look at where to point our blame, we are forgetting to take responsibility for our own actions.
Our society is walking backwards. Evolution and technology haven't given us eyes in the back of heads yet. We have to fall down eventually. And when we do, it's gonna hurt the entire race.
Lack of responsibility is a lack of competence. We are not born with this competence. We are taught it by our parents and teachers.
Depending on our experiences, each of us have a different level of emotional competence to accept responsibility.
Hot coffee burns.
Do we have to be told to be careful?
We do if we don't have the emotional competence to accept the results of our actions.
It's easier to blame another person, an event, or a thing for the resulting damage to ourselves.
In every great story, there is are three prominent characters: The villain, the hero and the victim.
We never play the role of villain in our own stories. We accept the role of hero or victim.
The victim says "Oh my, look what the villain has done to me."
The hero says, "I will right this wrong and save the day."
The villain says with conviction, "I didn't do anything wrong."
No one is right. No one is wrong.
The villain in your story believes you are the villain. The villain actually believes you are the one who wronged him.
So who's right?
It doesn't matter. You can be right or you can be happy. That's the only choice.
We have to accept the shit that happens to us and try to understand what we could've done differently.
We're the only ones to blame.
It's time we all take responsibility like a Boss. Otherwise, our species is going to wake up one day in a dimly lit cave wondering why the gods hate us so much.
That's the path we're on.
Don't blame me.
It's not my fault.
Sunday, June 19, 2016
I am a fan but I hate you
I watched you enter a league of professionals. You were truly one of a kind. It was fun watching you dominate a league of men, when you were only a teenager.
Then something changed. You wanted more. And by wanting more, you got less from me. I stopped cheering for you. You are the best. But you're also a whiner.
Nobody likes a whiner.
I love talent. And when I see it, I drool over it. It's awesome to watch.
And you have it in spades.
But man, I hate you now. I can't explain it. I cheer against you.
History doesn't deserve your greatness. Despite it all, you're not only the best of a generation, you may be the best of all time. But I still hate you.
Whiner, go back to South Beach. Cleveland doesn't need you. They deserve better. I hope they get a title one day but not when you're there.
Your return to your hometown was a public relations move and I hated it the day you decided to come home. As you try to rebrand yourself, I know you for who you really are.
Whiner.
Splash, splash. Let's go Warriors.
Then something changed. You wanted more. And by wanting more, you got less from me. I stopped cheering for you. You are the best. But you're also a whiner.
Nobody likes a whiner.
I love talent. And when I see it, I drool over it. It's awesome to watch.
And you have it in spades.
But man, I hate you now. I can't explain it. I cheer against you.
History doesn't deserve your greatness. Despite it all, you're not only the best of a generation, you may be the best of all time. But I still hate you.
Whiner, go back to South Beach. Cleveland doesn't need you. They deserve better. I hope they get a title one day but not when you're there.
Your return to your hometown was a public relations move and I hated it the day you decided to come home. As you try to rebrand yourself, I know you for who you really are.
Whiner.
Splash, splash. Let's go Warriors.
Monday, May 30, 2016
Self proclaimed experts
Listening in a noisy world is difficult. The internet has made everything loud.
Finding an expert today is like having a conversation in a nightclub with a pretty girl, while the base booms through your arteries.
Expertise is hard to find. Everyone is advertising themselves as experts these days. And so few are.
To make the wrong decision and spend good money after bad experts seems to be more common than ever before.
There was a time when there were only one expert in a category. We knew them, or we knew someone who knew them. They were the busiest. They didn't have to advertise. Customers took care of that for them through word of mouth marketing.
And then one day, something changed. The internet came along. Choices grew. Business became a battleground.
The busiest couldn't do any more business, so all the others would brawl for the remainder of the pie. They would quarrel on price, service, and time. They would argue who was better. And all claimed to be the best. But customers knew who was the best because their friends would tell them. The BEST was already extremely busy. He didn't need the extra work and therefore didn't need to brag.
Actually he never bragged.
I was thinking about this scenario recently as it applied to softball. When a newcomer moves to town and wants to play softball, he puts his name on a "spare" list to get picked up by a team. There are about 50 new names every year added to the list. In every case, when that player brags about his ability, he's a dud.
I watched a guy who was supposed to be really good, strike out four times this week. In a game where strikeouts are rare, he demonstrated his expertise at failing.
In other cases, I've heard guys, with complete humility say that they had played a bit and would like to come out and have some fun with new found friends.
In a noisy world, when a company brags about themselves, I believe they are overcompensating for something they are not. Just like in softball, the braggarts are not the best. The company that doesn't brag is the better choice.
Tuesday, May 10, 2016
A lesson about marketing from a hitchhiker
I was driving into work this morning, when I had the urge to pull over and let a complete stranger enter my car.
My mom wouldn't approve, so I didn't do it.
He had his thumb extended wishing to fetch a drive to somewhere unknown. Not knowing if my destination intersected with his, I decided not to stop. I wouldn't have stopped anyways. I've only picked up one hitchhiker in my life, and it was someone I knew.
I worried about the smell. He looked allergic to bath water. The Seinfeld episode on body odour was lingering among my other thoughts.
Then I thought about my friend Paul. He used to hitchhike every weekend two hours each way to see his lovely lady friend back in 1995.
Paul knew he needed to sell himself to the countless cars zooming by. He explained hitchhiking was a numbers game. And that someone always picked him up within ten minutes of starting his adventure.
Approaching this role like any sales job, Paul would put on a tie and suit jacket and carry a briefcase. That usually got him his lift. Who wouldn't pick up a business man in distress? If that didn't work, he would pull out a sign from his briefcase, which doubled as his luggage.
The sign would simply say, "Going home to see my mom". Now that's marketing. He tapped into people's emotions.
How often do we see the hitchhiker who looks like he is on his way to Woodstock? Hair tied back in a ponytail, facial hair that has been growing for a few months, army jacket, with matching hiking boots and wool socks and shorts. Probably has a hunting knife somewhere stashed in his duffle bag waiting to be used on his next victim. The duffle bag matches the army surplus gear. It's tossed to the side of the road, trying to hide from view waiting for someone to pick them up.
I often wonder who picks up these nomads. It must surely be other nomads who can associate with them. I wouldn't pick them up unless I knew them. There's probably nothing wrong with them, until they decide to pull out that hunting knife and steal my car.
But who wouldn't pick up my friend Paul? Paul sold himself and marketed himself within two seconds that someone zoomed by. He only needed two seconds. He always found a buyer. It was too good of a deal.
How do we present ourselves in our own marketing?
How does our business present itself?
Are we vagrants looking for a free ride?
Or we built on a purpose that is easily identifiable for all potential buyers?
My mom wouldn't approve, so I didn't do it.
He had his thumb extended wishing to fetch a drive to somewhere unknown. Not knowing if my destination intersected with his, I decided not to stop. I wouldn't have stopped anyways. I've only picked up one hitchhiker in my life, and it was someone I knew.
I worried about the smell. He looked allergic to bath water. The Seinfeld episode on body odour was lingering among my other thoughts.
Then I thought about my friend Paul. He used to hitchhike every weekend two hours each way to see his lovely lady friend back in 1995.
Paul knew he needed to sell himself to the countless cars zooming by. He explained hitchhiking was a numbers game. And that someone always picked him up within ten minutes of starting his adventure.
Approaching this role like any sales job, Paul would put on a tie and suit jacket and carry a briefcase. That usually got him his lift. Who wouldn't pick up a business man in distress? If that didn't work, he would pull out a sign from his briefcase, which doubled as his luggage.
The sign would simply say, "Going home to see my mom". Now that's marketing. He tapped into people's emotions.
How often do we see the hitchhiker who looks like he is on his way to Woodstock? Hair tied back in a ponytail, facial hair that has been growing for a few months, army jacket, with matching hiking boots and wool socks and shorts. Probably has a hunting knife somewhere stashed in his duffle bag waiting to be used on his next victim. The duffle bag matches the army surplus gear. It's tossed to the side of the road, trying to hide from view waiting for someone to pick them up.
I often wonder who picks up these nomads. It must surely be other nomads who can associate with them. I wouldn't pick them up unless I knew them. There's probably nothing wrong with them, until they decide to pull out that hunting knife and steal my car.
But who wouldn't pick up my friend Paul? Paul sold himself and marketed himself within two seconds that someone zoomed by. He only needed two seconds. He always found a buyer. It was too good of a deal.
How do we present ourselves in our own marketing?
How does our business present itself?
Are we vagrants looking for a free ride?
Or we built on a purpose that is easily identifiable for all potential buyers?
Wednesday, May 4, 2016
I believe...
What do you believe in? Think about it. What do you believe in so much that when you sway from your beliefs, your conscience lectures you into sleeplessness.
Have you ever written out a values statement to remind yourself and others what you believe in?
Some of us write them out. But most don't, because they are engrained into our upbringing. They emerge when we have kids as we try to pass them to the next generation.
Most values statement aren't worth much, unless they are read every single day. The problem with a values statement is that it only makes sense to you. And if you don't read it everyday, the statement becomes academic and trivial, lost in the papers of life, while you float in the vast ocean of somethingness, headed toward nothingness, while your conscience beacons you to return to safe shores.
For a values statement to have meaning, it must be written in plain, every day language. It must be void of interpretation. It must be the foundation in which all decisions are made. It must help us make decisions when we are in conflict between two equal but opposite choices.
In a team, a values statement is even more important. The leader wants everyone to choose the right path, when two tempting choices float their way.
If a values statement is vague, the interpretation will be open and the results cannot be predictable.
If a values statement is clear, everyone navigates their choices in the same direction and the destination is not just predictable.
It is intended.
Boring, corporate value statements are written on boards, laminated and posted at the front entrance of most offices. They are neighbours to mission statements, visions statements and they all live in the same useless academic community.
I remember having a values statement stare at me everyday in one of my office jobs. Our leader read in Harvard Business Review that it would get lost at the front desk, so he got all the middle and senior managers together. We spent two days in a hotel conference room developing our new mission, vision and values. The process was interesting. And I felt good about it because I was included in the process. After the two days were complete, we felt like we had direction. He laminated them and put one in every office as a constant memory of what happened on those two days. It didn't change the culture of the organization. It didn't change the work ethics of the employees. It didn't do a damn thing except make him our leader look like he was a smart strategist.
The problem was with the leader. The first item on the values list was respect. He lacked respect for his staff and would fire them if someone looked at him the wrong way. His vision was never going to work because he didn't align with the values statements.
You can learn a lot about someone when you know what they stand for and what they stand against.
There's a better way. And simpler too.
At a recent class, I was asked to write out my belief statements. I had to articulate what my business stood for, in every day language.
I wrote them out. And so did everyone else in the class. We shared them, and we realized that the simpler the statement the more powerful the message.
The simpler the statement, the easier it is to remember.
The simpler the statement, the easier it is to follow.
When values are written clearly, they can be guiding principles.
There is one rule in developing "I believe" statements. They can't sound corporate-y. They have to be written in every day language.
What are your "I believe" statements?
Here are the ones I recently developed for my new business.
This wasn't developed by a committee.
It's not up for discussion.
It will be a guide for everyone in how we act.
There are no exceptions for any person, including the owner.
And no one is perfect, so we'll deal with each mistake in a human, respectful way.
We believe work is sometimes hard, but it doesn’t have to go unappreciated.
We believe work should be fun.
We believe that people come before profits.
We believe that no one is perfect, and there’s always a more human way to deal with issues.
We believe that we could laugh a lot more.
We believe that customers deserve our best.
We believe that karma is a bitch, so we work hard to not upset her.
Have you ever written out a values statement to remind yourself and others what you believe in?
Some of us write them out. But most don't, because they are engrained into our upbringing. They emerge when we have kids as we try to pass them to the next generation.
Most values statement aren't worth much, unless they are read every single day. The problem with a values statement is that it only makes sense to you. And if you don't read it everyday, the statement becomes academic and trivial, lost in the papers of life, while you float in the vast ocean of somethingness, headed toward nothingness, while your conscience beacons you to return to safe shores.
For a values statement to have meaning, it must be written in plain, every day language. It must be void of interpretation. It must be the foundation in which all decisions are made. It must help us make decisions when we are in conflict between two equal but opposite choices.
In a team, a values statement is even more important. The leader wants everyone to choose the right path, when two tempting choices float their way.
If a values statement is vague, the interpretation will be open and the results cannot be predictable.
If a values statement is clear, everyone navigates their choices in the same direction and the destination is not just predictable.
It is intended.
Boring, corporate value statements are written on boards, laminated and posted at the front entrance of most offices. They are neighbours to mission statements, visions statements and they all live in the same useless academic community.
I remember having a values statement stare at me everyday in one of my office jobs. Our leader read in Harvard Business Review that it would get lost at the front desk, so he got all the middle and senior managers together. We spent two days in a hotel conference room developing our new mission, vision and values. The process was interesting. And I felt good about it because I was included in the process. After the two days were complete, we felt like we had direction. He laminated them and put one in every office as a constant memory of what happened on those two days. It didn't change the culture of the organization. It didn't change the work ethics of the employees. It didn't do a damn thing except make him our leader look like he was a smart strategist.
The problem was with the leader. The first item on the values list was respect. He lacked respect for his staff and would fire them if someone looked at him the wrong way. His vision was never going to work because he didn't align with the values statements.
You can learn a lot about someone when you know what they stand for and what they stand against.
There's a better way. And simpler too.
At a recent class, I was asked to write out my belief statements. I had to articulate what my business stood for, in every day language.
I wrote them out. And so did everyone else in the class. We shared them, and we realized that the simpler the statement the more powerful the message.
The simpler the statement, the easier it is to remember.
The simpler the statement, the easier it is to follow.
When values are written clearly, they can be guiding principles.
There is one rule in developing "I believe" statements. They can't sound corporate-y. They have to be written in every day language.
What are your "I believe" statements?
Here are the ones I recently developed for my new business.
This wasn't developed by a committee.
It's not up for discussion.
It will be a guide for everyone in how we act.
There are no exceptions for any person, including the owner.
And no one is perfect, so we'll deal with each mistake in a human, respectful way.
We believe work is sometimes hard, but it doesn’t have to go unappreciated.
We believe work should be fun.
We believe that people come before profits.
We believe that no one is perfect, and there’s always a more human way to deal with issues.
We believe that we could laugh a lot more.
We believe that customers deserve our best.
We believe that karma is a bitch, so we work hard to not upset her.
Tuesday, May 3, 2016
Finding good people to work with
Mona likes working in her business. She works hard. Her dad taught her that skill. He owns five different businesses.
Every morning, her dad would leave the house before she got up. Many nights, she would be in bed before he came home.
She spent the next 13 years watching and learning from her dad. Her dad is a hard ass and works his people to extremes mentally and physically.
Mona used to work for me. At 18 years old, her work ethic could battle even my own. I was proud of her. She was dependable, trustworthy and respectful to my business and my own personal needs.
She was not perfect. Mona didn't like working with people who didn't share her work ethic. I didn't promote her into management because I worried she would destroy the team culture I built.
Despite all of her strengths, she was never going to be one of my managers. She is more than capable to manage things. My managers had to LEAD people. I didn't think Mona had the leadership gene.
One day Mona accepted a job with her dad and she left me. I was sad to see her leave. Good people like Mona don't come along every day.
It wasn't long before she realized that working for her dad was never going to work. They were from the same fruit bowl. With her dad's help, Mona built a business she could call her own.
It was a great business with line-ups of customers, loads of revenue, and bucket fulls of profit. But little by little, the customers eroded and profits went with them.
Mona didn't realize she wasn't capable of leading people. She knew how to work hard. She knew how to treat customers. She didn't know how to lead her own staff. So they quickly quit after a few months of abuse.
The hamster wheel of hiring had begun.
I sat with Mona and asked her what her number one complaint was. It was the same answer I always get. "Staff! If I could clone myself I wouldn't have any worries", was her answer.
Mona didn't want a business. She wanted a personal revenue stream. She fails to understand that without staff, nothing gets done.
I was at Mona's business today. The toilet wouldn't flush. It was no big deal. It needed a bit of a push. It's something I have done a hundred times at home. With no plunger in the bathroom, I had to tell one of the employees. The employee gave me a disgusted look, remarked about it being a dirty job and then went to the stockroom to retrieve the plunger. I watched her walk to the bathroom, pinching the plunger between her thumb and index finger like the previous usage was vaporizing onto her fingers.
Mona wasn't here today. Her staff would rather not be here. It's not her staff's fault.
Mona hasn't led them.
Working with minimum wage staff with minimum wage mentality isn't easy.
It starts with the hiring process.
How do you hire your staff?
What selection process do you use?
Sometimes the key to a good hire is the use of a good employment ad.
Here's a sample of two different employment ads. Which would you rather work for considering the compensation is about the same?
Leadership starts with the first communication that a new potential employee sees.
Ad #1:
We are looking for the right fit for our brand.
We are looking for positive, outgoing, energetic and skilled team members for our Kithcen Team. The applicant must have minimum two years of experience. All applicants must be available for evenings and weekends.
We are looking for positive, outgoing, energetic and skilled team members for our Kithcen Team. The applicant must have minimum two years of experience. All applicants must be available for evenings and weekends.
Ad #2:
Wouldn’t you like to work for someone who treats you like a person and not a number?
Working in the restaurant industry should be fun. It’s not a job. Well of course it’s a job. But it doesn’t have to feel like one.
Here’s what XYZ Company believes in:
We believe work is sometimes hard, but it should never be unappreciated.
We believe work should be fun.
We believe that people come before profits.
We believe that no one is perfect, and there’s always a more human way to deal with issues.
We believe that we could laugh a lot more.
We believe that customers deserve our best.
We believe that karma is a bitch, so we need to work hard to not upset her.
XYZ Company is a new restaurant coming to ABC town. We are now hiring counter service employees to start in mid June.
Monday, April 25, 2016
Finding your purpose
Purpose is a funny thing that only comes from conscious beings.
I never thought much about purpose before three years ago. I lived my life, tried to be good to others and pursued my goals.
But then something happened on the way to death. I realized that one day there would be a knock on the door and I would no longer be here.
The urgency of creating something of extreme value became important. I was looking for my purpose. I didn't want to live a wasted life.
Not that I was looking for fame. I wanted to be able to laugh on my deathbed knowing I had accomplished something important in my time here.
In my first year of business school, we learned about the importance of mission statements.
I translated what I learned from business into a personal mission statement.
And I missed the point badly.
The reason for the mistake is businesses don't understand mission statements. Follow someone who doesn't know what they're doing and you'll end up in the same ditch, eventually.
As this was swirling in my head, I decided to open another restaurant. Again I wrestled with purpose and mission of this new business. It bothered me. I was supposed to have these answers for clients and I couldn't even come up with them for myself.
One sleepless night, while thinking about purpose, mission and trying to figure out what I stood for, I came to the realization that I did not have the answer. I had to seek it out from others.
Then I was enlightened by a brilliant nine year old, who just happens to be my son.
I asked my kids what the purpose of this new business was going to be. My ten year confirmed what most would say, "It's about making money".
Then my nine year old, who LOVES money, articulated so clearly why it couldn't be about money. I have been trying to tell businesses for years why money could not be the purpose. And he told us in a couple of sentences why businesses fail.
To put this into context, my nine year old doesn't do very well in school. He loves money. He counts his birthday and Christmas money at least three times per week. We've had to take away his wallet because he would roll around in it if we would let him. When I say, he loves money, I mean he LOVES money. Every winking moment, he thinks about, associates it to things and wants more of it.
But here's what he told his sister and I that morning around the breakfast table.
"It can't be about money. It will make you look selfish. No one wants to buy anything from someone who is selfish".
And there it was. The answer I was looking for. In the lack of a real purpose, people and businesses are thought to be SELFISH. In a selfish transaction, it's a dog eat dog world.
You want my money, what are you giving me in return.
Where's the discount?
Give me what I want and I will give you what you want.
That's simple transactional buying. It's the biggest pitfalls most businesses fall into.
And it can be avoided by existing on purpose.
I walk into my favourite coffeeshop and I don't know their purpose.
The default is to make money.
The default is selfish.
I go to buy a car or a sofa. The business talks about how it's going to save me money.
I'm not dumb. I know my savings are translated into profits for the seller.
Now I want a bigger discount.
I will price shop because no one is taking care of me, but me.
SELFISH
The opposite of SELFISH is GENEROSITY.
What are you generous with?
Time, Money, Education, Happiness, etc?
How do you promote them in your life or in your business.
So there it is. This new business will stand for generosity. It will be a giving corporation. It will take care of its employees, its customers, its community.
I'll share more about Generosity as it relates to marketing in my next blog.
I never thought much about purpose before three years ago. I lived my life, tried to be good to others and pursued my goals.
But then something happened on the way to death. I realized that one day there would be a knock on the door and I would no longer be here.
The urgency of creating something of extreme value became important. I was looking for my purpose. I didn't want to live a wasted life.
Not that I was looking for fame. I wanted to be able to laugh on my deathbed knowing I had accomplished something important in my time here.
In my first year of business school, we learned about the importance of mission statements.
I translated what I learned from business into a personal mission statement.
And I missed the point badly.
The reason for the mistake is businesses don't understand mission statements. Follow someone who doesn't know what they're doing and you'll end up in the same ditch, eventually.
As this was swirling in my head, I decided to open another restaurant. Again I wrestled with purpose and mission of this new business. It bothered me. I was supposed to have these answers for clients and I couldn't even come up with them for myself.
One sleepless night, while thinking about purpose, mission and trying to figure out what I stood for, I came to the realization that I did not have the answer. I had to seek it out from others.
Then I was enlightened by a brilliant nine year old, who just happens to be my son.
Then my nine year old, who LOVES money, articulated so clearly why it couldn't be about money. I have been trying to tell businesses for years why money could not be the purpose. And he told us in a couple of sentences why businesses fail.
To put this into context, my nine year old doesn't do very well in school. He loves money. He counts his birthday and Christmas money at least three times per week. We've had to take away his wallet because he would roll around in it if we would let him. When I say, he loves money, I mean he LOVES money. Every winking moment, he thinks about, associates it to things and wants more of it.
But here's what he told his sister and I that morning around the breakfast table.
"It can't be about money. It will make you look selfish. No one wants to buy anything from someone who is selfish".
And there it was. The answer I was looking for. In the lack of a real purpose, people and businesses are thought to be SELFISH. In a selfish transaction, it's a dog eat dog world.
You want my money, what are you giving me in return.
Where's the discount?
Give me what I want and I will give you what you want.
That's simple transactional buying. It's the biggest pitfalls most businesses fall into.
And it can be avoided by existing on purpose.
I walk into my favourite coffeeshop and I don't know their purpose.
The default is to make money.
The default is selfish.
I go to buy a car or a sofa. The business talks about how it's going to save me money.
I'm not dumb. I know my savings are translated into profits for the seller.
Now I want a bigger discount.
I will price shop because no one is taking care of me, but me.
SELFISH
The opposite of SELFISH is GENEROSITY.
What are you generous with?
Time, Money, Education, Happiness, etc?
How do you promote them in your life or in your business.
So there it is. This new business will stand for generosity. It will be a giving corporation. It will take care of its employees, its customers, its community.
I'll share more about Generosity as it relates to marketing in my next blog.
Monday, April 18, 2016
Business and friendships
If you could own an audience, to the point where they would listen to every word you said, and then acted on your words, what would that be worth?
Is it better to talk to more people screaming from he mountaintops hoping that someone will give a shit enough to listen? Or is it better to have a few friends who like you, respect you enough to listen, and honest enough to not talk behind your back?
Business has lost its way.
Despite what you think, a business does not have to be all things to all people. It has to be all things to the "right" people.
It is the job of your marketing team to find the "right" people.
Jesus Christ wasn't able to convince all the people.
Why would business people think they can?
Let's paint a picture.
You own a jewelry store and you want to sell 1 more diamond engagement ring each week.
Typically, a smart marketing person would ask questions like,
"Who's the target audience"
"What's your budget"
"Where does the target audience hang-out"
Then, they would market to the target audience screaming from the mountain top hoping someone will listen in their busy lives.
Most won't hear the message.
Some will hear it and not care.
Some will hear it, and consider your product while they shop the best deal, which may not be with you.
Almost no one will buy from you without price shopping first. You haven't earned their respect.
All you got was their attention.
Sustainable business is based on small friendships.
We don't find friends by yelling at them.
We don't find friends by talking to as many people as possible.
Friendship isn't a numbers game. And neither is good marketing.
There are fundamental rules for a friendship to work.
1. We have to want to be around each other.
2. We need to trust each other.
3. We want to help the other person without asking anything in return.
Businesses have forgotten the rules of friendship.
Most businesses want only one thing - money from its customers. And in exchange they offer a product or service.
We call that a transaction.
Not a friendship.
The first time a "target customer" hears a commercial, there has to be a connection in the message. No likeable message, no potential friendship. As the target continues to hear the ad, increases in likeability leans toward respect.
Respect is trust's mirror image.
Trust builds confidence and pushes action. When the "target customer" decides to interact with the brand and gets the same experience the ad made him feel, he will buy.
The purchase decision was already made through the emotions the ad created. The experience at the business reinforces the emotion.
Business isn't a numbers game. Let your message hang out with potential customers. Some will hate what you have to say. Some will love it. Let the ones who love it enter your friendship circle. Tell stories. Listen.
Don't yell or brag. In other words, don't be an asshole. Being an asshole attracts other assholes. Assholes aren't good for business unless you sell toilet paper.
With time, there will be new, cool, people hanging out in your business, wanting to buy from you.
Marketing is easy.
Good marketing is hard.
How many friends has your business made recently?
Is it better to talk to more people screaming from he mountaintops hoping that someone will give a shit enough to listen? Or is it better to have a few friends who like you, respect you enough to listen, and honest enough to not talk behind your back?
Business has lost its way.
Despite what you think, a business does not have to be all things to all people. It has to be all things to the "right" people.
It is the job of your marketing team to find the "right" people.
Jesus Christ wasn't able to convince all the people.
Why would business people think they can?
Let's paint a picture.
You own a jewelry store and you want to sell 1 more diamond engagement ring each week.
Typically, a smart marketing person would ask questions like,
"Who's the target audience"
"What's your budget"
"Where does the target audience hang-out"
Then, they would market to the target audience screaming from the mountain top hoping someone will listen in their busy lives.
Most won't hear the message.
Some will hear it and not care.
Some will hear it, and consider your product while they shop the best deal, which may not be with you.
Almost no one will buy from you without price shopping first. You haven't earned their respect.
All you got was their attention.
Sustainable business is based on small friendships.
We don't find friends by yelling at them.
We don't find friends by talking to as many people as possible.
Friendship isn't a numbers game. And neither is good marketing.
There are fundamental rules for a friendship to work.
1. We have to want to be around each other.
2. We need to trust each other.
3. We want to help the other person without asking anything in return.
Businesses have forgotten the rules of friendship.
Most businesses want only one thing - money from its customers. And in exchange they offer a product or service.
We call that a transaction.
Not a friendship.
The first time a "target customer" hears a commercial, there has to be a connection in the message. No likeable message, no potential friendship. As the target continues to hear the ad, increases in likeability leans toward respect.
Respect is trust's mirror image.
Trust builds confidence and pushes action. When the "target customer" decides to interact with the brand and gets the same experience the ad made him feel, he will buy.
The purchase decision was already made through the emotions the ad created. The experience at the business reinforces the emotion.
Business isn't a numbers game. Let your message hang out with potential customers. Some will hate what you have to say. Some will love it. Let the ones who love it enter your friendship circle. Tell stories. Listen.
Don't yell or brag. In other words, don't be an asshole. Being an asshole attracts other assholes. Assholes aren't good for business unless you sell toilet paper.
With time, there will be new, cool, people hanging out in your business, wanting to buy from you.
Marketing is easy.
Good marketing is hard.
How many friends has your business made recently?
Wednesday, March 30, 2016
It's time to play
The fat lady does not stop and we do not pay attention.
For there are better things to do.
Than exit stage right.
Time is like the fat lady.
Singing to remind us that although we think we have just began, we are wrong.
Time is not measurable, even though we measure it.
Time cannot be bottled up into a jar and preserved like a common beetle.
We try to account for our time so we live fuller, deeper, more meaningful lives.
Inventions save us time from the tediousness of our lives.
But time spins out of control, going faster and faster until our allotment of it ends.
An wise old lady once told me, "What we focus on, expands."
It made sense, until I relate it to time.
When I focus on time, it does not expand. It races away.
As a child, time was irrelevant and stood still.
As an adult, everything has a deadline. Time is accounted for, and it speeds up.
Time does not exist, except in our own minds.
I have no time.
I wish I had time.
If I could only find the time.
It's time to get up.
Time-out,
What time is it?
Where did the time go?
We put so much emphasis on time, that we do not live. Trying to accomplish all the shit we set out to do before we go to sleep. Trying to meet deadlines measured by a unit of time, we cram it all in trying to make our lives more complete.
Accounting for time wastes our lives away, not enjoying the life we've been given.
Have you ever gone on vacation and came home exhausted? Of course, your routine was changed. You didn't have to be at work. But you added deadlines to your playtime.
You wanted to see, do, experience things. Even the simple pleasures of drinking poolside, was declared as relaxing, when in fact it was on your imaginary "To-do" list.
Time cannot be harnessed. It is not a wild horse waiting for its rider to tame it. It is you who is the wild horse.
Time owns your ass. You are here for a moment in time's infinacy.
If you want time to slow down, you may be too late. It will depend on how far you are up your own ass.
If there's anything we learn from children, time slows down for those who play.
Go find your play and play more.
For there are better things to do.
Than exit stage right.
Time is like the fat lady.
Singing to remind us that although we think we have just began, we are wrong.
Time is not measurable, even though we measure it.
Time cannot be bottled up into a jar and preserved like a common beetle.
We try to account for our time so we live fuller, deeper, more meaningful lives.
Inventions save us time from the tediousness of our lives.
But time spins out of control, going faster and faster until our allotment of it ends.
An wise old lady once told me, "What we focus on, expands."
It made sense, until I relate it to time.
When I focus on time, it does not expand. It races away.
As a child, time was irrelevant and stood still.
As an adult, everything has a deadline. Time is accounted for, and it speeds up.
Time does not exist, except in our own minds.
I have no time.
I wish I had time.
If I could only find the time.
It's time to get up.
Time-out,
What time is it?
Where did the time go?
We put so much emphasis on time, that we do not live. Trying to accomplish all the shit we set out to do before we go to sleep. Trying to meet deadlines measured by a unit of time, we cram it all in trying to make our lives more complete.
Accounting for time wastes our lives away, not enjoying the life we've been given.
Have you ever gone on vacation and came home exhausted? Of course, your routine was changed. You didn't have to be at work. But you added deadlines to your playtime.
You wanted to see, do, experience things. Even the simple pleasures of drinking poolside, was declared as relaxing, when in fact it was on your imaginary "To-do" list.
Time cannot be harnessed. It is not a wild horse waiting for its rider to tame it. It is you who is the wild horse.
Time owns your ass. You are here for a moment in time's infinacy.
If you want time to slow down, you may be too late. It will depend on how far you are up your own ass.
If there's anything we learn from children, time slows down for those who play.
Go find your play and play more.
Friday, March 18, 2016
The greatest inventions save us time
Time is not a renewable resource.
When it's gone, so are we.
All the greatest inventions have one thing in common - they saved us time.
Social media was accepted because it saved us on our most valuable resource.
We're human. We take advantage. We push the limits. We spoil ourselves and get sick by eating too much too fast. We are with time like we are with most good things: prone to addiction.
Social media and smart phones were created to help people connect, faster than ever before. The inventions allowed little snips of conversations to happen at light speed allowing us to deliver and consume little snips of conversations faster than we had ever done before with more people than ever thought possible.
What happened is what always happens with good things.
Overuse,
Followed by addiction,
Followed by social consequence.
These new inventions are exposing issues with productivity, anger, self righteousness and show-offery.
Social media is supposed to save us time. We're supposed to communicate faster online so we can get back to living our lives offline. Instead we're living our lives faster online, so we can live less offline.
I saw a "Facebook" friend last summer in person. It had been 20 years since I saw him last. Not 100% certain, I chose not to speak up. The next day, I talked with him online.
Am I the only fucked up introvert who has ever done this?
As the lines of personal and keyboard interactions continue to blur, our lives are more connected, but less interesting.
And in the process the dark truth of humanity gets exposed.
When it's gone, so are we.
All the greatest inventions have one thing in common - they saved us time.
Social media was accepted because it saved us on our most valuable resource.
We're human. We take advantage. We push the limits. We spoil ourselves and get sick by eating too much too fast. We are with time like we are with most good things: prone to addiction.
Social media and smart phones were created to help people connect, faster than ever before. The inventions allowed little snips of conversations to happen at light speed allowing us to deliver and consume little snips of conversations faster than we had ever done before with more people than ever thought possible.
What happened is what always happens with good things.
Overuse,
Followed by addiction,
Followed by social consequence.
These new inventions are exposing issues with productivity, anger, self righteousness and show-offery.
Social media is supposed to save us time. We're supposed to communicate faster online so we can get back to living our lives offline. Instead we're living our lives faster online, so we can live less offline.
I saw a "Facebook" friend last summer in person. It had been 20 years since I saw him last. Not 100% certain, I chose not to speak up. The next day, I talked with him online.
Am I the only fucked up introvert who has ever done this?
As the lines of personal and keyboard interactions continue to blur, our lives are more connected, but less interesting.
And in the process the dark truth of humanity gets exposed.
Tuesday, March 15, 2016
The Donald
A year ago, I nervously predicted that Donald Trump would be one of the republican finalists. Friends said he didn't have a chance. Friends explained how the nominations worked and how he would eventually flicker away.
Knowing very little about American politics, I felt a little safer in their justifications. But one thing worried me. Donald was marketing himself better than anyone had ever done before him. He had "real" brand recognition. He was saying things that no one ever dared say before. He was "different". And that had to be worth something in the popularity contest called an election.
Donald Trump is a joke. His ability to convince a growing group of people that he should be the next president of the United States is not. He gains popularity even though he doesn't say anything of value.
I have a theory why this joker is encouraged to continue down the electoral path. People have been yearning for someone to say something different. No more political rhetoric. No more boring conversations about jobs, economy and healthcare.
Let's talk about walls, making America Great again, and deporting immigrants.
Trump doesn't act like a politician. He acts like a marketer. He says things in ways that gets emotion riled up in people. He stirs up the water to get the sediment in the bottom to float to the top. He wants people to be afraid. He wants them to get angry. He wants them to be politically incorrect.
He is zigging when everyone else zags. And that's why he is winning.
The fears, racism and anger have always been there, buried deep in the political correct world the public has been forced to live in. Donald Trump gives people permission to exercise those emotions. And they feel good about themselves when they do.
A good marketer makes you feel good about your decisions.
We all know, The Donald doesn't have the goods to lead the country. And cooler heads may prevail when the final ballots are counted. He can't win. Can he?
Trump has opened the gates to Arkham Asylum. The crazies are being granted permission to run next time.
The fearful, angry voters will turn up another radical politician. A politician who presents well and sells to both the uninformed and informed voter is going to emerge.
It is not Trump I am afraid of. It is his successor.
The next nut job won't look like a joke. He won't talk like a joke. He will be well respected until it's too late. The Donald has laid the foundation for future radical politicians.
We should be worried.
Knowing very little about American politics, I felt a little safer in their justifications. But one thing worried me. Donald was marketing himself better than anyone had ever done before him. He had "real" brand recognition. He was saying things that no one ever dared say before. He was "different". And that had to be worth something in the popularity contest called an election.
Donald Trump is a joke. His ability to convince a growing group of people that he should be the next president of the United States is not. He gains popularity even though he doesn't say anything of value.
I have a theory why this joker is encouraged to continue down the electoral path. People have been yearning for someone to say something different. No more political rhetoric. No more boring conversations about jobs, economy and healthcare.
Let's talk about walls, making America Great again, and deporting immigrants.
Trump doesn't act like a politician. He acts like a marketer. He says things in ways that gets emotion riled up in people. He stirs up the water to get the sediment in the bottom to float to the top. He wants people to be afraid. He wants them to get angry. He wants them to be politically incorrect.
He is zigging when everyone else zags. And that's why he is winning.
The fears, racism and anger have always been there, buried deep in the political correct world the public has been forced to live in. Donald Trump gives people permission to exercise those emotions. And they feel good about themselves when they do.
A good marketer makes you feel good about your decisions.
We all know, The Donald doesn't have the goods to lead the country. And cooler heads may prevail when the final ballots are counted. He can't win. Can he?
Trump has opened the gates to Arkham Asylum. The crazies are being granted permission to run next time.
The fearful, angry voters will turn up another radical politician. A politician who presents well and sells to both the uninformed and informed voter is going to emerge.
It is not Trump I am afraid of. It is his successor.
The next nut job won't look like a joke. He won't talk like a joke. He will be well respected until it's too late. The Donald has laid the foundation for future radical politicians.
We should be worried.
Wednesday, February 24, 2016
You are Legend.
Let's imagine the landscape of North America 400 years ago. Europeans have started to infiltrate the land and explore the territory of the continent.
There were two types of pioneers. Those that settled the land and those who wanted to explore and discover new territory.
The settlers escaped from their past. They wanted a new beginning.
The explorers sought out adventure. They wanted to be legends.
The settlers escaped from their past. They wanted a new beginning.
The explorers sought out adventure. They wanted to be legends.
Not all settlers realized a better life in their new environment. Dangers came to them. And some died before their time from these threats.
Not all explorers became legends. Some of them died in their search for adventure. Their knowledge died with them.
It is only the explorers that succeeded in their quest that we learn about in history books.
The same is true in today's world.
The adventurers are called by a higher purpose. Not all will succeed. Some will fail miserably never to be heard of again. Some will achieve such fame and fortune that songs will be written about them.
The settler will die, just like the adventurer. Dangers still come to them. And some die before their time should be up. The person who settles for a simple life ends up in the same position as the adventurer.
He lives a life not lived. Engraved with a fear for adventure, the settler works hard at surviving, providing and protecting his family, not realizing that a bear is about to tear down his door, rip out his throat before he cocks the gun.
There are more dangers to the adventurer. There is a greater chance of death. But his life will be lived while he is alive. And if he finds super success, not only will he live a luxurious life, his legend will live for generations through our children's stories.
Not all explorers became legends. Some of them died in their search for adventure. Their knowledge died with them.
It is only the explorers that succeeded in their quest that we learn about in history books.
The same is true in today's world.
The adventurers are called by a higher purpose. Not all will succeed. Some will fail miserably never to be heard of again. Some will achieve such fame and fortune that songs will be written about them.
The settler will die, just like the adventurer. Dangers still come to them. And some die before their time should be up. The person who settles for a simple life ends up in the same position as the adventurer.
He lives a life not lived. Engraved with a fear for adventure, the settler works hard at surviving, providing and protecting his family, not realizing that a bear is about to tear down his door, rip out his throat before he cocks the gun.
There are more dangers to the adventurer. There is a greater chance of death. But his life will be lived while he is alive. And if he finds super success, not only will he live a luxurious life, his legend will live for generations through our children's stories.
Tuesday, February 23, 2016
Overcoming the Monster
I remember my 10th grade history teacher, Mr. Olscamp, shrieking in a high pitch fitting for a role in MacBeth, "Those who do not know their history are bound to repeat it".
He was referring to the similar errors in judgement of Adolf Hitler and Napoleon Bonaparte.
The english word "history", is lent from latin with origins from the Greek word historia, which meant finding out or narrative.
The word story is a derivative of the word history or its predecessor historia.
The word story also comes from historia.
A story is a narrative on a sequence of events, whether real or fantasy.
History supposedly recounts only actual events.
Yet when we break it right down, history is nothing more than a series of stories. Are they factual or fantasy? Unless you were there, you can't be entirely sure.
Napoleon is credited with saying, "History is written by the winners of war".
What I have witnessed is that stories repeat.
They are told with different characters, different events, different locations. But there are only seven basic plots to any story. Everything else is a derivative of the seven plots.
Imagine a character who is utter evil. One who takes no prisoners. A killer. No love interests. No emotion. The evil mission is the only thing that drives him. There is no internal struggle. He kills. He's mechanical, not maniacal. He will terrorize until he is destroyed or he completes his mission.
Who is the character?
Terminator (the first movie)
Darth Vader (Star Wars)
Drago (Rocky IV)
The shark (Jaws)
Voldemort (Harry Potter)
Jason (Friday the 13th)
Michael Myers (Halloween)
Bane (Batman)
Grendel and Grendel's mother (Beowulf)
These movies all recount the same plot. It's called "Overcoming the Monster".
Each story starts with a menacing introduction to the villain. The reader is afraid of him/her. He is introduced to the hero and the rest of the storyline details how the hero fights an epic battle until he defeats the villain.
History repeats. The stories change based on the narrator. But in reality, they are all similar in plot.
The stories are simply repeating. They tell the same story with a super villian and someone who is challenged to defeat the super villain.
In real life, we see real life monsters in "characters" like Adolf Hitler, Joseph Stalin, Saddam Hussein, Osama Bin Laden.
Has anything really ever changed? Or do we just like a good Monster story.
He was referring to the similar errors in judgement of Adolf Hitler and Napoleon Bonaparte.
The english word "history", is lent from latin with origins from the Greek word historia, which meant finding out or narrative.
The word story is a derivative of the word history or its predecessor historia.
The word story also comes from historia.
A story is a narrative on a sequence of events, whether real or fantasy.
History supposedly recounts only actual events.
Yet when we break it right down, history is nothing more than a series of stories. Are they factual or fantasy? Unless you were there, you can't be entirely sure.
Napoleon is credited with saying, "History is written by the winners of war".
What I have witnessed is that stories repeat.
They are told with different characters, different events, different locations. But there are only seven basic plots to any story. Everything else is a derivative of the seven plots.
Imagine a character who is utter evil. One who takes no prisoners. A killer. No love interests. No emotion. The evil mission is the only thing that drives him. There is no internal struggle. He kills. He's mechanical, not maniacal. He will terrorize until he is destroyed or he completes his mission.
Who is the character?
Terminator (the first movie)
Darth Vader (Star Wars)
Drago (Rocky IV)
The shark (Jaws)
Voldemort (Harry Potter)
Jason (Friday the 13th)
Michael Myers (Halloween)
Bane (Batman)
Grendel and Grendel's mother (Beowulf)
These movies all recount the same plot. It's called "Overcoming the Monster".
Each story starts with a menacing introduction to the villain. The reader is afraid of him/her. He is introduced to the hero and the rest of the storyline details how the hero fights an epic battle until he defeats the villain.
History repeats. The stories change based on the narrator. But in reality, they are all similar in plot.
The stories are simply repeating. They tell the same story with a super villian and someone who is challenged to defeat the super villain.
In real life, we see real life monsters in "characters" like Adolf Hitler, Joseph Stalin, Saddam Hussein, Osama Bin Laden.
Has anything really ever changed? Or do we just like a good Monster story.
Wednesday, January 27, 2016
Darth Vader was bipolar
The greatest of all film franchises, Star Wars, is a battle between good and evil. The evil side of the force is called "The Dark Side". I always thought the dark side was absolute evil.
From the first time we see Darth Vader, we know him to be a mechanical, maniacal evil being. We are afraid of him. Until we realize he used to be human. He used to have a wife and mother. He used to be good.
He had a couple of kids. He was a family man. His love drove him to his evil. His view of the world changed.
He was empty.
He was lost.
He was a dog.
He obeyed his master.
And he submitted it to him until his master tried to hurt his child. That's when the dog turned on his master and killed him.
The child's love for him removed the dark side.
The dark side is not unequivocal evilness.
The dark side is a kind of depression.
The dark side does not care about the future because the past is so painful.
It is the removal of hope.
It is the pain from the loss of love.
It is anger.
It is seeing things in absolutes: Always and Never.
According to Yoda, emotion is the path to the dark side.
We see that Anakin's emotion of love drives him to his darkness.
We saw the disintegration of Anakin Skywalker with the loss of his mother.
Jedi's didn't marry because the path of love lead to darkness. Anakin disobeyed that order and married anyways, which again led him to his darkness.
The opposite of love is indifference.
If the Jedi do not love and are not passionate, then they are indifferent.
Who's the good guy: those who love too much or those who don't love at all?
Here's my take:
Darth Vader was an evil dude. That evilness grew because Anakin was passionate. He was full of life and emotion. Love led him to his dark side. He became depressed. Anakin was bipolar. When he felt the loss of love from his mother and wife, he withdrew from the world into a great depression. He didn't care what happened to him anymore...until he found out he had a son. And then he was redeemed.
With a background in finance and marketing, Rick Nicholson owned two highly successful restaurants before selling them to start a consulting business. His current company The Restaurant Ninjas provides tools to the foodservice industry to become more profitable. His book, "The Art of Restaurant Theft" can be downloaded for free at www.therestaurantninjas.com
You can subscribe to Rick's weekly email newsletter and his thoughts on business, life and everything in between at:
http://forms.aweber.com/form/
From the first time we see Darth Vader, we know him to be a mechanical, maniacal evil being. We are afraid of him. Until we realize he used to be human. He used to have a wife and mother. He used to be good.
He had a couple of kids. He was a family man. His love drove him to his evil. His view of the world changed.
He was empty.
He was lost.
He was a dog.
He obeyed his master.
And he submitted it to him until his master tried to hurt his child. That's when the dog turned on his master and killed him.
The child's love for him removed the dark side.
The dark side is not unequivocal evilness.
The dark side is a kind of depression.
The dark side does not care about the future because the past is so painful.
It is the removal of hope.
It is the pain from the loss of love.
It is anger.
It is seeing things in absolutes: Always and Never.
According to Yoda, emotion is the path to the dark side.
We see that Anakin's emotion of love drives him to his darkness.
We saw the disintegration of Anakin Skywalker with the loss of his mother.
Jedi's didn't marry because the path of love lead to darkness. Anakin disobeyed that order and married anyways, which again led him to his darkness.
The opposite of love is indifference.
If the Jedi do not love and are not passionate, then they are indifferent.
Who's the good guy: those who love too much or those who don't love at all?
Here's my take:
Darth Vader was an evil dude. That evilness grew because Anakin was passionate. He was full of life and emotion. Love led him to his dark side. He became depressed. Anakin was bipolar. When he felt the loss of love from his mother and wife, he withdrew from the world into a great depression. He didn't care what happened to him anymore...until he found out he had a son. And then he was redeemed.
With a background in finance and marketing, Rick Nicholson owned two highly successful restaurants before selling them to start a consulting business. His current company The Restaurant Ninjas provides tools to the foodservice industry to become more profitable. His book, "The Art of Restaurant Theft" can be downloaded for free at www.therestaurantninjas.com
You can subscribe to Rick's weekly email newsletter and his thoughts on business, life and everything in between at:
http://forms.aweber.com/form/
Cost and benefit
In a perfect world, what would you be doing if time and money were no object?
Why aren't you doing it?
This is a hypothetical question to get to the root of where you want to be. Time and money are usually the two reasons why we don't do what we want.
Maybe you want to be your own boss. You'd like to work for yourself but you're scared.
Everyone tells you owning a business is risky.
It is.
The cost of failure is easy to measure.
Look at all the money you are going to invest in your project. Consider the income you won't receive while doing this. Understand the payment you are currently making on your mortgage, car and credit cards won't be made if you aren't earning a weekly wage.
The cost can be catastrophic.
The bank could take the house and the car.
Your name could be ruined for future loans.
Everything you worked so hard for will be gone in a flash.
Because you wanted to follow your dream.
You're scared of the cost because the potential loss can be calculated.
Here's what can't be calculated: The benefit.
You won't know how much money you can make until you make the decision to do it.
You won't know how big your opportunity will be until you knock down some doors.
You won't know what life you could have until money starts coming in.
There's the known cost and the unknown benefit.
I believe that's why most of us fail to go for the dream.
We want to talk the risk out of doing something remarkable.
That's impossible.
So we run and hide, using the cost as our excuse.
With a background in finance and marketing, Rick Nicholson owned two highly successful restaurants before selling them to start a consulting business. His current company The Restaurant Ninjas provides tools to the foodservice industry to become more profitable. His book, "The Art of Restaurant Theft" can be downloaded for free at www.therestaurantninjas.com
You can subscribe to Rick's weekly email newsletter and his thoughts on business, life and everything in between at:
http://forms.aweber.com/form/
Why aren't you doing it?
This is a hypothetical question to get to the root of where you want to be. Time and money are usually the two reasons why we don't do what we want.
Maybe you want to be your own boss. You'd like to work for yourself but you're scared.
Everyone tells you owning a business is risky.
It is.
The cost of failure is easy to measure.
Look at all the money you are going to invest in your project. Consider the income you won't receive while doing this. Understand the payment you are currently making on your mortgage, car and credit cards won't be made if you aren't earning a weekly wage.
The cost can be catastrophic.
The bank could take the house and the car.
Your name could be ruined for future loans.
Everything you worked so hard for will be gone in a flash.
Because you wanted to follow your dream.
You're scared of the cost because the potential loss can be calculated.
Here's what can't be calculated: The benefit.
You won't know how much money you can make until you make the decision to do it.
You won't know how big your opportunity will be until you knock down some doors.
You won't know what life you could have until money starts coming in.
There's the known cost and the unknown benefit.
I believe that's why most of us fail to go for the dream.
We want to talk the risk out of doing something remarkable.
That's impossible.
So we run and hide, using the cost as our excuse.
With a background in finance and marketing, Rick Nicholson owned two highly successful restaurants before selling them to start a consulting business. His current company The Restaurant Ninjas provides tools to the foodservice industry to become more profitable. His book, "The Art of Restaurant Theft" can be downloaded for free at www.therestaurantninjas.com
You can subscribe to Rick's weekly email newsletter and his thoughts on business, life and everything in between at:
http://forms.aweber.com/form/
Tuesday, January 26, 2016
Choice between two fears...
We hear about risk and reward and most of us get the concept. The more you risk, the higher the reward can be. The inverse is also true. The less you risk, the lower the reward.
I remember the first time I went to the university swimming pool. At the far right was the high diving board. It was 800 feet high. I timidly stayed in the shallow end watching my brave friends bounce off it to a thunderous splash below.
Watching this for a half hour, I decided to go to the top and enjoy the same fun. Each step up the ladder was easy. I wasn't scared. Everyone else was doing it. No big deal.
Until I got to the top and walked out to the edge of the board to look down. I must have miscalculated the height. At the top, it looked like 1800 feet down. I was struck with panic. I thought I was going to die. Death from jumping or death from embarrassment were my two choices. I chose embarrassment.
I had to walk shamefully back down the ladder, taking each declining step while listening to the whispers of ridicule. I was now a chicken according to my classmates.
My son was recently faced with a similar dilemma. He made a different choice. He chose death by jumping. He told me that embarrassment was too much to handle. I envy his fearlessness.
Thinking about this, I wonder how many of us have the same fear when it comes to getting into business or doing our one true calling in life.
The choice between two fears paralyzes.
In life, just like in the pool, doing nothing doesn't allow us to have the fun we could have. Only those who put themselves at great risk have the most fun. Only those willing to face their fears to find what they are looking for actually find it.
We are not here to get by.
We are not here to the ordinary.
We are not here to stand in the shallow end of the pool.
We were placed here to do great things.
We are here to live.
Where's your greatness? And what's your plan to share it with the world?
Scary shit, eh!
Just like the diving board to an eight year old kid...
I remember the first time I went to the university swimming pool. At the far right was the high diving board. It was 800 feet high. I timidly stayed in the shallow end watching my brave friends bounce off it to a thunderous splash below.
Watching this for a half hour, I decided to go to the top and enjoy the same fun. Each step up the ladder was easy. I wasn't scared. Everyone else was doing it. No big deal.
Until I got to the top and walked out to the edge of the board to look down. I must have miscalculated the height. At the top, it looked like 1800 feet down. I was struck with panic. I thought I was going to die. Death from jumping or death from embarrassment were my two choices. I chose embarrassment.
I had to walk shamefully back down the ladder, taking each declining step while listening to the whispers of ridicule. I was now a chicken according to my classmates.
My son was recently faced with a similar dilemma. He made a different choice. He chose death by jumping. He told me that embarrassment was too much to handle. I envy his fearlessness.
Thinking about this, I wonder how many of us have the same fear when it comes to getting into business or doing our one true calling in life.
The choice between two fears paralyzes.
In life, just like in the pool, doing nothing doesn't allow us to have the fun we could have. Only those who put themselves at great risk have the most fun. Only those willing to face their fears to find what they are looking for actually find it.
We are not here to get by.
We are not here to the ordinary.
We are not here to stand in the shallow end of the pool.
We were placed here to do great things.
We are here to live.
Where's your greatness? And what's your plan to share it with the world?
Scary shit, eh!
Just like the diving board to an eight year old kid...
Monday, January 25, 2016
Who's your daddy?
Death stalks us every day like a hungry wolf waiting to smell our weakness. It pounces revealing her crooked teeth. It is in this moment that we make a decision. Do I want to live or is today the day I die. Death cannot win when we fight back. It's when we stop giving a fuck that the wolf chomps on our deathly remains. Time takes away that fight. Sickness takes it away too.
Fear the dog and he will bite.
Be strong, brave and fearless and the dog usually backs down.
Who is going to play the alpha?
We can't cheat death. We can't run from it.
The only thing we can do when faced with the cross-eyed beast is to show it who's in charge.
.
Fear the dog and he will bite.
Be strong, brave and fearless and the dog usually backs down.
Who is going to play the alpha?
We can't cheat death. We can't run from it.
The only thing we can do when faced with the cross-eyed beast is to show it who's in charge.
.
Friday, January 8, 2016
Howard Shultz must be rolling in his grave
Howard, if you were still alive, it wouldn't be this way.
Why would I go to Starbucks and be a prisoner?
Not locked up. That would be far better.
I'm a prisoner to the discussions of the employees. I don't want to know all about Sarah's latest problem with her boyfriend. I don't know Sarah. It's sad. But I didn't come here to be sad. I came here for my Grande Caramel Machiatto.
Do I have to hear about the red cup and how yesterday is the last day they could use it. Then to my surprise, I showed up today to see the Christmas cup still available.
Do I care?
Nope. Unless these perfectly good cups go in the garbage. Then I'll be mad because Starbucks will be wasteful.
Christmas is over.
The cup is red.
Nothing refers to the cup as a Christmas cup.
Even The Donald thought we should boycott Starbucks because they removed "Christmas" from the holiday cup.
We should boycott Donald.
But that's a rant for another day.
I don't want to hear about how shifts are being cut back to the baristas who can't sell sandwiches.
I don't want to see baristas taking a table on their break where I could've sat.
I don't want to see the dining room full of unopened boxes because the cafe designer didn't make enough space for dry storage in the back.
I don't need to be emprisoned in the cafe drama.
I have enough of my own problems.
Today, I want to know if Howard Shultz is squirming in his coffin.
The coffee chain is moving away from its special place in my heart.
What?
Howard Shultz isn't dead?
Then what the f*(&?
Howard, get to work and fix this.
One of my favourite brands needs your help.
I think it's your favourite brand too.
If you want to hear some of my thoughts on how to fix this problem, I'm only a tweet away.
With a background in finance and marketing, Rick Nicholson owned two highly successful restaurants before selling them to start a consulting business. His current company The Restaurant Ninjas provides tools to the foodservice industry to become more profitable. His book, "The Art of Restaurant Theft" can be downloaded for free at www.therestaurantninjas.com
You can subscribe to Rick's weekly email newsletter and his thoughts on business, life and everything in between at:
http://forms.aweber.com/form/
Why would I go to Starbucks and be a prisoner?
Not locked up. That would be far better.
I'm a prisoner to the discussions of the employees. I don't want to know all about Sarah's latest problem with her boyfriend. I don't know Sarah. It's sad. But I didn't come here to be sad. I came here for my Grande Caramel Machiatto.
Do I have to hear about the red cup and how yesterday is the last day they could use it. Then to my surprise, I showed up today to see the Christmas cup still available.
Do I care?
Nope. Unless these perfectly good cups go in the garbage. Then I'll be mad because Starbucks will be wasteful.
Christmas is over.
The cup is red.
Nothing refers to the cup as a Christmas cup.
Even The Donald thought we should boycott Starbucks because they removed "Christmas" from the holiday cup.
We should boycott Donald.
But that's a rant for another day.
I don't want to hear about how shifts are being cut back to the baristas who can't sell sandwiches.
I don't want to see baristas taking a table on their break where I could've sat.
I don't want to see the dining room full of unopened boxes because the cafe designer didn't make enough space for dry storage in the back.
I don't need to be emprisoned in the cafe drama.
I have enough of my own problems.
Today, I want to know if Howard Shultz is squirming in his coffin.
The coffee chain is moving away from its special place in my heart.
What?
Howard Shultz isn't dead?
Then what the f*(&?
Howard, get to work and fix this.
One of my favourite brands needs your help.
I think it's your favourite brand too.
If you want to hear some of my thoughts on how to fix this problem, I'm only a tweet away.
With a background in finance and marketing, Rick Nicholson owned two highly successful restaurants before selling them to start a consulting business. His current company The Restaurant Ninjas provides tools to the foodservice industry to become more profitable. His book, "The Art of Restaurant Theft" can be downloaded for free at www.therestaurantninjas.com
You can subscribe to Rick's weekly email newsletter and his thoughts on business, life and everything in between at:
http://forms.aweber.com/form/
Monday, January 4, 2016
Feeling the love
What happens to a person who doesn't feel love anymore?
The limits of that person's character get tested.
He does things he normally wouldn't do.
He acts in desperation trying to find what no longer exists in his eyes.
Depression lives in the box of desperation.
Sadness thrives in darkness.
Loneliness grows like a virus.
Each person has a love language. Most of us love the way we want to be loved.
And that's where we fail our loved ones.
We don't gift something we want. We gift something our friend would want.
Love is no different.
Understanding what makes our loved ones feel special is fundamental to a loving relationship.
There are five love languages:
The limits of that person's character get tested.
He does things he normally wouldn't do.
He acts in desperation trying to find what no longer exists in his eyes.
Depression lives in the box of desperation.
Sadness thrives in darkness.
Loneliness grows like a virus.
Each person has a love language. Most of us love the way we want to be loved.
And that's where we fail our loved ones.
We don't gift something we want. We gift something our friend would want.
Love is no different.
Understanding what makes our loved ones feel special is fundamental to a loving relationship.
There are five love languages:
- Gifts
- Spending Quality time together
- Words of Affirmation
- Acts of Service
- Physical Touch
Although all five of them sound good, there is one dominant language for each of us. To discover and act on how our loved ones want to be loved is the key to a beautiful life.
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