My first car

As a young man enters adulthood, he dreams about having his own "wheels". No longer dependant on friends, his parents or the bus schedule, his ability to roam is equivalent to the freedom to fly.

I was no different. Up to my ears in university debt, coupled with a low paying entry level job, I drove my motorcycle for two summers before crawling into deeper debt of a car loan. Pissed off that I was working everyday and all my friends had cars, I made the decision to buy one anyways.

My first car was a 1995 Honda Civic. It was a year old when I bought it. A cherry red, two door coupe, five speed manual transmission with spoiler and bug deflector made me feel like Michael Andretti downshifting into turns and revving the engine to 6000 rpm.

I drove that car for seven years and 325000 kilometres until my new bride convinced me that a car with four doors was more practical with the inevitable arrival of kids.

The car was awesome. But I discovered something more remarkable when I purchased it.

A young woman had purchased the car a year earlier. She no longer wanted it. The dealer was trying to help her get out of it so she could get something else. A big mouthed friend heard about the car and convinced me that this was the car I should buy.

So I drove an hour away, passing fourteen car dealerships to test drive and purchase this car.

In early 2003, it was time to find a new car worthy of my desires. My first starter Honda was so good, I wanted to upgrade to the next level. The adult car in the lot, the Honda Accords winked at me every time I drove by them.

I would drive into the lot, wink back and promise to one day test drive her.  In the summer, I made the decision to take her for a spin. Getting into the car, her leather smelled of good taste. Her smooth handling told me I was a great driver. Her colour made me feel rich. Sold on the car before a salesman said a word, I was ready to sign for another loan.

The sales guy unsold me. It wasn't the price. It wasn't the payment plan. It was the arrogance of not only the salesman but also other people who were working there. I wasn't going to give this company any of my money even though I knew I wanted this car.

I called up the Honda dealership an hour away. I told them the colour, model and year I wanted. The salesman told me he didn't have one in stock but he could trade with another dealer and would have the car by the end of the week.

At the end of the week, I drove happily an hour to pick up my new silver chariot. The car had 300 kilometres on it. My first NEW car!!! Why did it have so many kilometres? The car came from a dealership 3 hours away. When asked why they didn't trade with the dealer in my town, someone coughed and I heard a faint whisper of discontent.  I wasn't the only one who despised those guys.

The best part of my relationship with my Honda dealership was that I never had to negotiate on price of a new car. Early on, in my research, I used to put one dealer's price against the other. What I found was the squirrel dick dealership would make me work in the negotiation to get the best price. My preferred dealership wouldn't even negotiate. Their starting price was always lower than the best negotiated price of the squirrel dick dealership.

Since 1996, I have made the hour long trek four times to buy a new car. I always waste the squirrel dicks time by test driving his cars before driving an hour to buy. I never negotiate.  I never dicker. I accept the price as being the best price without question. The employees from 1996 are still there.

My salesman remembers my name, what I do for a living and the types of cars I own. In a world of faceless interactions and purchases, my salesman takes the time to remember some simple things about me.

I've called there a couple of times and noticed that everyone from the service or parts guy to the owner may answer the phone. I'm pretty good with voice recognition. But this company is the only one I can't tell whom I talking to. They all sound the same. They all act the same. They all care for the customer the same.

This doesn't happen by accident. The owner, who has had very limited contact with me in 20 years, calls me by name each time I walk by his office. He remembers what I do, asks about my wife by name.

I'm sitting at McDonald's writing this because my car is in the Honda garage. As I was driving yesterday, the air conditioning stopped cooling. I had to pass by the dealership this morning on my way back home, so I decided to stop in.

The service guy, who was clearly already swamped with today's orders stopped what he was doing to talk to me. He promised to push my service to the front of the queue so I could get back home. Then he told me the problem was under warranty. The salesman gave me a brand new car so I could eat breakfast.

Why would I ever buy from the dip shits who want to treat me like another pain in the ass customer when I can drive an hour out of my way, spend my time and gas money to get treated like a respected person.

There are two types of customers: relational and transactional. The relational customers are looking for meaningful relationships with the brand. The transactional customer cares little about the relationship and mostly about the deal.

If you treat relational customers like a transaction, you'll disrespect them and they will divorce your brand. Relational customers represent 20% of your customers but 80% of your traffic. Losing a customer is never good, but losing a relational customer is equivalent to losing four transactional customers.

At face value, you may not tell the difference between the two, so it is extremely important to treat them all like relational customers.

Cumberland Honda is the only dealership I have ever purchased a car from. I love them as much today as I did on July 10, 1996 when I bought that little red Honda Civic.

Air propels the world's biggest ships

Watching a documentary on the world's biggest ships, I learned that these floating cities generate air bubbles under the boat to remove the friction between the hull and the water.

Boats float but to ride through the water requires it to push water out of the way.  Motion causes friction and friction costs money.

Removing friction allows the ship to go faster with less fuel expense.

The boat skates on the air bubbles.

Thinking about this new invention, I started to wonder about the friction of our lives. Could the removal of friction have the same benefit of a ship: that is to say we could achieve our goals faster with less energy?

Boat = Us
Destination = Our goals
Water = Life
Friction = Conflict

Friction is nothing more than all the things that slow us down while we ride the waves of life. Sometimes that conflict is inner and other times it's with another.

What's the friction in your life that weighs heavy? If you spend the majority of your energy of a particular area and you don't feel like you're moving forward, the friction is high.

Friction doesn't go away with more energy. Just like a ship, friction can only be reduced in a person's life by introducing something new.

The process will depend on the person. The size and frequency of air bubbles depend on the size of the ship. A person's "air bubbles" could be meditation, creative writing, dancing, singing or painting.

The air bubbles will come from the left brain, where creativity lies. Creativity is the key to living a teflon life.

Just like a boat needs some friction or it could not float, people need conflict. Without it, life would be too easy.

Do we treat life like an answering machine

"I'm sorry we can't come to the phone right now. Leave your name, number and message and we'll get back to you".

Does anyone not know what to do when the voice mail clicks on? Do we really have to be told to leave a message? It's not dangerous to leave the same message. It's un-offensive. It's non-remarkable.

In the pasture of sameness, it is the different ones that stand out and get noticed - even praised.

I used to live with my sister before I met my queen. When my sister wasn't looking, I changed the voice mail to "Hey cool cats, you know the drill".

In the settings of your cellular phone, the manufacturer places a tag at the end of every email that gets sent. It usually says something boring like, "sent from iPhone". I changed mine to "sent by intergalactic space's new carrier pigeon."

In both cases, I was scared what others would think of me. The feedback was positive. I was no longer boring. I peaked interest for a brief second. And in the world of sales sameness, my messages stood out. Those who don't like it are the same fuddy duddies I don't like to play with. My messages are filters. I don't have to be all things to all people. I just have to be the right things to enough people who value me, my ideas and abilities.

Everyone else can grip their tea cups properly by extending their pinky finger straight out. I don't care about high tea, the monarchy or any of the prissy people who can't feign a smile at a tasteless joke.

Messages aren't the only things that have become automated. So have our conversations. Digital conversations from Facebook and Instagram have become too predictable.

Predictable is boring. Boring is not living. Boring is safe. Boring is unremarkable. Boring is a slow death.

We're trained not to stand out. Our mom's taught us not be obnoxious. There's a huge difference between standing out and being obnoxious.

Standing out risks ridicule or worse criticism. It is safer to blend in than it is to offend.

Are you treating your life like an answering machine?
When no one is looking, I dare you to do something unconventional.
Anything...
Change your answering machine message, or your cellular phone settings, or your hair colour or car to a wild pink. Decide to wear shorts all the time, even in the middle of winter.  It doesn't matter what you decide, a simple change will make you more vibrant, more memorable, more alive.

Find courage and act on something that scares you a little.  Life wasn't meant to be recorded and replayed a hundred times. It was meant to be lived every day with all the nuance, and variables that each day can offer.

Boring doesn't garner attention. Boring doesn't elicit salesmanship.
Boring is like whispering.
Take mom's advice, whispering in front of others isn't polite.

Ta ta for now!

PS. Harland Sanders was given the title of honourary Kentucky colonel by a politician. He created the character, the wardrobe and his iconic facial hair to create a personality that belonged to him, outlived his life and will continue to sell fried chicken for the next hundred years. #anythingbutboring

The game of Risk

I've never played RISK, the board game.

The risk I play with is business risk.

I am not afraid of risk. But I don't like it.

Risk is a girlfriend's nagging mother. Wanting to marry the girl, you have to accept the mother even though she could a deal breaker. The benefit of a wife has to outweigh the cost of her mother to move forward.

In business, we can't measure the benefit when decisions have to be made. So we make best guess estimates. If the estimates are accurate, our decisions will prove to be good. If they are not, our decisions will be poor.

When I was a teenager, kids used to dive off a train bridge into the river. Regardless of the tide and the level of the water, some kids would plunge into the water headfirst with no regard to life. For me the benefit was nothing more than a thrill. Plummeting into water gives the same refreshing feeling regardless of which body part enters first. To me, diving into low tidal waters was reckless.  For me the risk of paralysis or death wasn't worth the thrill, so I never dove.

Some say getting into business is risky.

Poor decisions result in poor results and wise decisions may result in positive results.

But we don't know which one we are making at the decision point. Time is the only teller.

Not doing something has an element of risk as well. And we can't measure that risk until time has also passed.

If a person wants to open a business, the logical people weigh the costs and potential losses of going into business and losing the game.

They consider staying in a job as winning.
We don't measure the costs of staying in a job and losing.
We assume there will always be jobs for us.
We assume things will work out, when we are employed.

We don't make those same assumptions in business.

Keeping a job is perceived as safe, even secure. Only time gives us 20/20 vision. But we can't go backwards. Time only goes forward.

Risk is not the problem. Neither is fear the problem.

An entrepreneur does not love risk. She hates it like everyone else.
She knows how to evaluate it, limit it and act courageously in the face of it.

We have a courage problem.

The fishing line of life

Life is but a fishing line cast out onto the ocean of being.
In search for the riches of the sea, only to be slowly reeled in one day at a time.

Some lines get cast far from shore. Some are cast close.
The distance is not known until the reel stops with the hook only seconds from the pole.
The distance doesn't matter. The ability to enjoy our time in the sea is what is important.

Whether the riches are caught or not, the fisherman decides if the pole will cast the life again.
If the fisherman stops, so does the hope to catch another fish.
If the fisherman casts, life will rise again.

-In memory of my friend Marc Allain

House of Common Animals...

Once upon an election, I used to get excited. It was a time to voice my displeasure or pleasure with the current administration. I felt important. I felt like I was making a difference with my vote.

Then I realized politics is dirty. Politicians are mostly lawyers who know how to debate the finer points of language. They know how to use words against an opponent to uphold their own agenda.

I read today the name of the lawyer representing parents against school closures. There was no mention that five years ago he was the minister of education.

New candidates represent hope and change. Promises are made that cannot be kept. The public accepts the bullshit because each time it believes this person is going to be different.

But he never is. And it's not his fault.

The system is the same. Parties get elected. Leaders rise to supreme power when a majority of their colleagues of the same colour get voted in. The public doesn't vote for leaders. The public votes for a representative. If the public doesn't like the leader that an elite group votes in, the local representative has to be removed as a show of displeasure for leadership. Yet if other parts of the country don't display the same displeasure, the leader can remain in power.

Absolute power corrupts absolutely.

Only time breeds displeasure. The removal of the leader takes time. The best leaders eventually piss off enough people to get removed.

And that's where our system is flawed. Voting doesn't change anything. As long as a leader remains popular, it doesn't matter how a person votes.  It's easy to be popular. Don't make tough decisions. Don't be polarizing and don't say anything to offend.

That makes me sad. For years I thought the ability to vote was an important display of freedom.

When laws get changed to allow for attack ads, I feel dirty.
When politicians lie and cheat the taxpayers, I feel raped.
When bureaucrats spin the truth because they don't believe there is absolute truth, I get angry.

Politics is a good business for dirty, and cut throat politicians. Change will not happen because the system will not allow it to happen.

Nothing changes with new leadership. For there to be change, processes and systems have to be re-invented. To have change, conventional thought and constructs need to be put aside.

If war is good for anything, it's the removal of conventional thought.

Re-invention can happen without war. But not without courage, humility, and a desire to not quit until success is achieved.

For politics to get back to being about representing the people, there is only one solution. Take away the one evil thing that drives people to get into politics: Greed. Remove pensions from elected officials. Remove expense claims and office stipends. Regulate salaries to the average of the region in which the candidate is elected. Flights and accommodations are paid for by the crown. Any extra expenses are paid for by the elected official.

The greedy will not run. The business of politics will not be appealing. Regular people will start to run for office. People who are honest. People who want to make a difference. Regular people who will not trade their integrity for their vote. Regular people serving regular people. And if they become dirty, another regular person will win the next election.

For things to change, the system needs to change. For the system to change, it's gonna take a maverick, to have enough balls and strength of character to put these ball-less elected officials in their place.

It's going to hurt for that maverick. It always does for the person who insists on change. He will face ridicule, threats, and possible death. That special person needs fortitude of character, the peace of mind and the ability to not quit.

That is the only way I believe change will ever happen. Otherwise the new boss will just be like the old boss. And the cycle will continue with disappointment, heartache and anger.

                                            "Won't Get Fooled Again" - The Who

We'll be fighting in the streets
With our children at our feet
And the morals that they worship will be gone
And the men who spurred us on
Sit in judgement of all wrong
They decide and the shotgun sings the song

The change, it had to come
We knew it all along
We were liberated from the fold, that's all
And the world looks just the same
And history ain't changed
'Cause the banners, they are flown in the next war

I'll move myself and my family aside
If we happen to be left half alive
I'll get all my papers and smile at the sky
Though I know that the hypnotized never lie
Do ya?

There's nothing in the streets
Looks any different to me
And the slogans are replaced, by-the-bye
And the parting on the left
Are now parting on the right
And the beards have all grown longer overnight

I'll tip my hat to the new constitution
Take a bow for the new revolution
Smile and grin at the change all around
Pick up my guitar and play
Just like yesterday
Then I'll get on my knees and pray
We don't get fooled again
Don't get fooled again
No, no!

Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Meet the new boss
Same as the old boss

Towering inferno

Leaving a safe secure job is as exciting as opening the door to your closet when you were four year's old.

It's frightening. There are monsters who lurk and want to eat little girl's tongues. Immobilized by fear, we don't open the door of darkness. We choose to remain on the other side of the room with the lights turned on.

For years I thought fear was the biggest thing holding us back from our dreams. I was wrong. It's something worse.

Humans are born with two fears: falling and loud noises. All the other fears we have are learned. Fear of loss, recognition, failure, what others think, public speaking, and many others are learned over time with our experiences.

I once had a young man working with me who was an amazing technician. He could do the job with little to no supervision. He was the perfect employee with one exception. He didn't like to deal with issues. He would avoid confrontation for any price. And that price hurt his team and my relationship with him. He was gutless. He was a coward.

A coward isn't someone who is fearful.  A coward is someone who lacks courage. If you remember, the Cowardly Lion in The Wizard of Oz, desired courage.

Courage is defined by acting despite fears.

Fear is not the problem. We all have them. Courage is the real issue.

For the young man who worked with me, he lacked courage. He didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings so he instead lived in a mire of conflict as he chose not to confront any of it.

For me, courage is someone who enters a burning building risking their own safety to save a life. The risk is much different if the life inside is a loved one.

Without courage, a person cannot move forward. Forget about fears. Acting despite fear is courage. Action is the most important step to realizing your dreams.

Courage
We lack to offend.
We desire to unhurt.
We avoid conflict.
So we sweep the issues,
Under the floating floors.
And in the end,
The one we hurt, 
Is ourselves.
We lack the courage to save a life 
Inside the burning building, 
Not realizing the smouldering life inside 
Is our own.