Saturday, January 20, 2018

A tea, a blinker, a battery and a door

I walked to my car with a hot cup of tea in my hand.
I didn't put a lid on it because it cools faster.
I don't like steaming hot tea.

Arriving at the car, the good Lord splashed a fresh coat of freezing rain on my windshield, so I reached in the car to put my tea on the dash while reaching for my window scraper.  I missed both the scraper and the dash. My tea leapt out of my hand and sprayed itself all over the interior of the car to show its ownership.

Feeling stupid, I still had to clean the windows. I pushed as much of the water off the important parts, so I could drive home.

Two minutes later, my left blinker started to wave at me. I hadn't flipped the signal light on. Cars were cautiously passing me, while I fiddled with the signal lights. It wouldn't go out, so I put on the hazard lights to balance out the left blinker.

After 5 minutes of driving, I thought maybe the left blinker would be tired of his continuous waving. But to no avail. Removing the hazards, he was still there waving away as if to say, "Hey jerky boy, I'm hurting over here with all this waving, can you please turn me off".

I listened and pulled to the side of the road. But I couldn't get the key out of the ignition. The car was in the middle of a coup and it was about to overthrow its king. I didn't know what to do. I don't know what it wants. The hazards are working fine, so I restart the car, and keep driving, with the lights cautiously telling everyone that I'm at war with my car.

After 15 more minutes of driving, I try taking off the hazards again. The left blinker must have been exhausted. He stopped waving. Phewf, everything seems to be back to normal. Another disaster has been avoided for another day, I think to myself.

And just as I think everything is back to normal, my right blinker starts buzzing, like he's hopped up on some good drugs.

I get home and thankfully shut down the car and my key comes out without a fight. The disaster is over. The blinkers are quiet, the ignition has released its formidable grip and I'm home safe. Everyone must've been tired.

Or so I thought.

The next morning, I get to the car to find out the doors won't open. That's it, they've kicked out their king. The car hates me for that stupid tea.

Not having time to ask for forgiveness, I asked my wife if I could use her car for the day, which she awesomely agreed.

Not knowing what conspired the night before, I went off on my merry way.

Later that day, I opened the side door to the van and it wouldn't close.
Viva la revolutionne.
I was until full attack from another car.
The door wouldn't close.
And as I tried to force it back into place, it leapt from its home into my arms.
I'm screwed. I can't drive a van without a side door.
Nothing I did was working. So in one last attempt, I apologize for my inattention and magically the revolt is disbanded.

I was able to get the door back onto the van so it was drivable until the next day when I got it fixed for $500.
I asked for forgiveness from my car, by showing remorse of the spilled tea.

And everything was back to normal.
As I see it in my mind.

Now here's the reality.
I spilled tea all over my car, temporarily screwing up the electrical. The battery died in the middle of the night because the parking lights came on after I got home. My wife's van door had been a problem for a while. Not thinking it would literally fall off, I had been ignoring the issue. Crazy that both things happened in less than 24 hours.

That's the boring way to look at it.

I could assume I had a run of bad luck. And you might not disagree with me.

But I think I had an amazing string of good luck.

Here's why:

If I don't spill the tea, my car doesn't act up.
The battery doesn't die.
I don't borrow my wife's car.
And the door doesn't fall off on me.
If falls into her hands.
She wouldn't know what to do.
Except call a tow truck and rental car place.
Besides me being worried, it would've cost $300-$400 more than it did.

The difference between good luck and bad luck is perspective. I'm $500 poorer but it gave me a great story to share.

Check your perspective the next time something shitty happen to you.
It might the best alternative to all the shitty options.

No comments:

Post a Comment