Thou shall not tell a lie. One of the sacred 10 rules that Moses brought to us.
So Moses, people lie. My wife started lying to me the second year we were together . I met her when she was 29 years old. She never aged for 10 years. Shallow, little white lies that don't hurt anyone.
There are two categories of lies: ones that hurt and those that don't. So lying is ok? My parents never taught me about the lies that were ok...
Early in my marriage, my wife asked me if she was getting fat. How do you answer that question without getting in trouble? She knows if she's packed on a few. She should have asked if I could tell she was gaining weight.
Relationship Lesson #1: Be honest.
Lesson #2: Never tell you're wife she's getting fat.
I failed that day in seeing the real question. I learned from my failure and refuse to ever get into that conversation again. I hurt her with my honesty. It is better to lie in order to keep people from getting hurt?
I tell my kids the truth will hurt. The lie will hurt more. You better hope if you're lying I don't find out.
There are people every day who tell me about their honesty. It's like they have to wear blinking lights to promote their good intentions. I wonder if these people are overcompensating for the lies they have told.
I read once that people who promote their honesty too often are the opposite. Honest people act, well honestly. They don't need to tell others they are honest because that's a given.
Recently, I started studying the art of reading a lie. Just like poker players, when being dishonest, people have different "tells". If I learn to read the tell, I'll keep these pretty little liars away from me.
If telling the truth hurts more than the lie, I'm going to call that exception to the rule.
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