What is love?

In the critically acclaimed movie, Love Story, there is a line that states, "Love means never having to say you're sorry." Anyone who's been in a loving relationship knows that's a load of crap. It's exactly this type of line that gets the girl inside all of us to well up with tears and gets us emotionally on board with the sappy Hollywood train. The reality is that apologizing for a wrong doing demonstrates that you care enough for another person to ask for forgiveness.

One could change the line completely 180 degrees and say, "Love means always having to say you're sorry". That might be a bit closer to the truth. If you're not asking for forgiveness, you're either a saint or you don't care enough about the person you've hurt.

I like a different variation of the definition of love that was popularized by a hit song in the movie, "Night at the Roxbury". Haddaway's song "What is love?" makes me smile as I see the two main characters foolishly bop their heads to the beat of the technotronic bass.

Let's look of the lyrics to the chorus.

What is love
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
What is love?
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more

Not very deep as is the case with most dance music. The definition of love is much closer to the truth than the sappy one previously mentioned.

If you love me, don't hurt me. If you do hurt me, I understand we all make mistakes. It's the ability to recover from those mistakes, apologizing, and moving forward that defines the love we have for one another.

Love isn't perfect. It's in the absence if it that we feel hurt. If you love someone, when they screw up, the ability to lash back does not solve the problem. It will make one person feel better in the short term. Ultimately it puts the relationship in trouble. A hurt cannot be fixed with an opposing hurt. Hurt only gets healed with love.

The ability to help someone heal from an emotional pain is the closest definition to love. Think about the last time you helped someone who was hurting. I'll bet you have love for them.